Matcha latte vs. bank balance – the reality of being a wedding planner
On Instagram, wedding planning often looks like a matcha latte and a laptop in a café, venue scouting and glossy pictures from getting ready to dinner. In episode 15 of “Dirty Wedding Talk”, the German-language podcast by Léconic about the real business of the wedding industry, I talked about what really goes on behind that picture.
Why the Instagram image of being a wedding planner bothers me
I have my own phrase for it: matcha latte versus bank balance. Through the Federation of German Wedding Planners (Bund deutscher Hochzeitsplaner) and the event management apprenticeships we offer, I see a lot of young talent. Many young people believe the job is all about work-life balance by the lake and beautiful styled shoots. That is why I want to use every platform I have to say: that is not how it is.
Almost anyone can pull off a beautiful shoot. Professional wedding planning is above all project management. At a styled shoot you simply move dinner forward if the sun sets earlier. On the wedding day there is no time for that – everything has to run smoothly.
I am a wedding planner at rockwedding, co-managing director of vonRock Events together with my husband Dominik, and a mother of three. So in the conversation I spoke from both perspectives: as a planner and as an entrepreneur running an event rental company.
Watch the full episode
You can watch the entire conversation (about 48 minutes, in German) right here:
Prefer to listen on the go? The episode is also available on Spotify, Apple Podcasts and dirtyweddingtalk.de.
I want to use every platform I have to say: that is not how it is.
A day in the life
Early shift, transport schedules, phone calls – and in peak season, mostly a runner
What does my day at vonRock really look like? I am in the office by half past seven, do the early shift, empty the dishwasher, water the flowers, work on quotes, create transport schedules, brief teams and answer the phone. In peak season I am above all one thing: a runner. I check everywhere that the warehouse crew has all orders ready and that everything runs smoothly. It does not sound glamorous – and yet I often tell myself: Anna, how lucky you are to have found your dream job.
The biggest challenge right now: budgets are being approved later and later. Event agencies often only get their budget shortly before the event and then quickly hand out the decor and furniture part. Sometimes our team and equipment have to be ready within two days – in the middle of the season. Today vonRock has ten permanent employees, with up to 20 freelancers joining us in peak season.
How couples can recognise a professional wedding planner
When everything looks the same from the outside, I would first look at references and Google reviews. And I would ask: how long have you been doing this full-time? What is your background? Couples do this far too rarely. On Instagram, it is worth looking behind the scenes: behind-the-scenes content and reels show more than glossy pictures.
In the end, the first consultation is what matters most. An experienced planner has their own agenda and asks about things you have not even thought of yet: a symbolic ceremony, guest numbers, curfew, children. One example: we get many enquiries for weddings on Lake Como. Some venues there end the party at 11 pm, while in Germany you can often celebrate until 2 am. If you learn something like that in the first meeting, you know right away: she knows what she is doing.
Team spirit yes – unpaid extra work no
From the rental side, I see what inexperienced planners often lack: timelines and information about the conditions on site. If instead of a ground-level delivery we suddenly face a 50-metre walk and a spiral staircase, extra costs arise – and in the end the couple pays for them.
Of course we help when a colleague is in a tight spot at an event. But laying out sunglasses, handing out favours or picking up cigarette butts is not our job – that is for the wedding planner’s assistant. I like to compare it to buying a car: if you configure the standard package, you cannot ask for package three when you pick it up. Anything extra on the day is an additional service. Fantastic costs money too.
For me, this clarity is not a lack of friendliness. For my couples I am a friend for a while, someone they can rely on 150 percent – but I keep work and private life clearly separate.
Being an entrepreneur in the wedding industry: a business that works all year round
When are you really an entrepreneur in this industry? For me, it is when you have built a business that carries you all year round. For us, that means weddings in summer and corporate events and large-scale equipment in winter. You have to project figures, compare and be able to make a living from it.
My own path started on the side. I come from the hotel industry, built up my self-employment during parental leave and worked part-time in my parents’ business until everything was secure. With three children born close together, the first full-time hire was a huge and important step. During the Covid years we expanded our premises and invested heavily. Many people thought we were crazy. Dominik was the driving force, I was more cautious – today I am glad we made that decision.
What I have learned: investments in visibility, advertising, networks and staff do not pay off immediately. You have to be patient and keep at it. Just as important is a safety net: what happens if one of us drops out or the economy changes? My basic rule: I have to be able to do things myself, or at least know where to get them. Today we combine wedding planning by rockwedding with our event rental company vonRock Events.
What is changing for couples and budgets right now
Couples today look very closely at their budget and set priorities. If you want a twelve-piece band and a fine-dining menu, you might save on florals. Some choose on-the-day coordination instead of full planning. I originally only wanted to offer full planning – today I am more flexible. With rentals we see two extremes: either no order at all, or a large one at very short notice. And surprisingly often, the parents pay for the wedding.
My biggest learnings of recent years: stay flexible, watch the market closely, step out of your comfort zone and make more time for networking.
The “Dirty Five” – answered on the spot
- Design: simple elegance rather than opulence
- Pinterest: more curse than blessing
- Trends: setting trends rather than just staying timeless
- Wedding size: intimate weddings
- The most important suppliers: food and music – and of course photography
Frequently asked questions about being a wedding planner
What does a wedding planner’s working day look like?
Much less café and photo shoot than Instagram suggests. A large part is project management: quotes, transport schedules, team leadership, phone calls and coordinating suppliers. In peak season, Anna-Maria Rock mainly works as a runner, making sure everything runs smoothly during set-up and at the event.
How can I recognise a professional wedding planner?
Look at references and Google reviews, ask about their background and full-time experience, and look for behind-the-scenes insights. The first consultation tells you the most: an experienced planner asks about the ceremony, guest numbers, curfew or children before you think of it yourself.
Can you start out as a wedding planner on the side?
Yes, almost everyone starts on the side, because it takes time before you can make a living from it. Anna-Maria Rock started that way too. What matters is experience, clear timelines and professional project management.
Why do additional services on the wedding day cost extra?
Anything that has not been agreed – such as staying longer or moving the bar again – is an additional service for which staff have to be paid. Clear agreements in advance protect everyone involved and avoid surprises with the costs.
Where can I watch or listen to the podcast episode with Anna-Maria Rock?
You can watch the episode “Matcha Latte versus Kontostand” (episode 15 of “Dirty Wedding Talk”, in German) as a video in this article. It is also available on YouTube, Spotify, Apple Podcasts and dirtyweddingtalk.de.
Many thanks to the team at Léconic and “Dirty Wedding Talk” for the open conversation and the opportunity to give an honest insight into the job of a wedding planner. On rockwedding.de I share further insights, inspiration and practical tips for a personal, realistic and well-organised wedding.
Matcha latte vs. bank balance: on the “Dirty Wedding Talk” podcast, wedding planner Anna-Maria Rock talks about the reality behind the job, how couples can recognise professional wedding planning and what it takes to be an entrepreneur in the wedding industry.
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More media features
Anna-Maria Rock regularly talks about wedding planning, costs and life as an entrepreneur on TV, radio, podcasts and in magazines:
- Why Weddings Are Getting More Expensive – Anna-Maria Rock on ZDF
- Why weddings have become more expensive – in the ARD interview
- Entrepreneur, mother & wedding planner – on SWR
- Anna-Maria Rock on “Zur Sache Baden-Württemberg” (SWR)
Find out how we can support your own wedding in our wedding planning services. You can browse all the weddings we have planned under Real Weddings.
Planning and rentals from a single source
Behind rockwedding is our in-house event rental company vonRock Events. For your wedding, that means short distances, a well-rehearsed team and equipment from our own stock, for example wedding chairs, floor-length tablecloths, escort walls for your seating chart and candle holders and lanterns.
